perfect christmas gift for men!

factastic!

I am very busy. Here is a forwarded email I found amusing. Read it.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (Oh my.)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes. (In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Don't try this at home, maybe at work.)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. ("Honey, I'm home. What the...?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes... lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still want to be a pig in my next life... quality over quantity.)

Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm...)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people. (If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (Okay, so that would be a good thing.)

A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder who was paid to figure that out.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed. (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species known to have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig??)

Thanks to neave!

snafu!

The term SNAFU (Situation Normal, All Fucked Up!) originated in WW II. What about this ?

Misa Yadav's answers!

Anybody want to know what Misa Yadav, Laloo's daughter wrote for her Medical Entrance Exam?

ANTIBODY - against everyone
ARTERY - the study of fine paintings
BACTERIA - back door to a cafeteria
BENIGN - what you be after you be eight
BOWEL -letters like a,e,i,o,u
CAESARIAN SECTION - a district in Rome
CARDIOLOGY - advanced study of poker playing
CAT SCAN - searching for lost kitty
CHRONIC - neck of a crow
COMA - punctuation mark
CORTIZONE - area around local courthouse
CYST - short for sister
DIAGNOSIS - person with a slanted nose
DILATE - the late British princess Diana
DISLOCATION - in this place
DUODENUM - couple in jeans
ENEMA - not a friend
FALSE LABOR - pretending to work
GENES - blue denim
GROIN - to mash to a pulp / smile
HERNIA - she is close by
HYMEN - greeting to several males
IMPOTENT - distinguished, well-known
LABOR PAIN - hurt at work
LACTOSE - person without toes
LYMPH - walk unsteadily
MENOPAUSE - I no wait
MICROBES - small dressing gowns
OBESITY - city of Obe
PACEMAKER - winner of Nobel Peace Prize
PULSE - grain
PUS - small cat
RED BLOOD COUNT - Dracula
RUPTURE - ecstasy
SECRETION - hiding anything
SUBCUTANEOUS - not cute enough
TABLET - small table
TUMOR - extra pair
ULTRASOUND - radical noise
URINE - opposite of you're out
VARICOSE - very close
VAS DEFERENS - extremely different
VEIN - at what time?

the power of human mind!

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

How to stop computer virus!

Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women!

• Beer stains wash out.
• A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer.
• Beer labels come off without a fight.
• After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 2 bucks.
• A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer on your breath.
• If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head.
• A beer always goes down easy.
• You can share a beer with your friends.
• You always know you're the first one to pop a beer.
• Beer is always wet.
• A beer doesn't change its mind after you've taken off its top.
• Beer doesn't expect an hour of foreplay before satisfying you.
• A beer looks as good in the morning as it did when the bar closed.
• Beer never bugs you to have little beers.
• Finishing a beer in 3 seconds is something to be proud of.

cool number plate!